10 ridiculous reasons for which I was ‘un-friended’ and blocked on Facebook


10 ridiculous reasons for which I was ‘un-friended’ and blocked on Facebook


I am probably one of the very first people after to have joined this most readily available medium of connecting with old friends, existing colleagues and future soul mates; yes, I am talking about Facebook.

Like every bald-headed, pot-bellied film director who does not even have the contacts to arrange the appropriate number of extras to dance behind a newbie actress in his never-to-hit-top-charts upcoming movie, but still insists that he is the mentor behind the success of every highest-paid star, I also take this privilege of being that one friend-in-need who invited nearly every close pal to this medium.

If many of my readers are younger than me, let me clarify that back in the stone-ages, Facebook was a ‘by invite only’ social medium enjoyed exclusively by the sprouting social media royals. The ones who were not lucky enough to know me, while openly gossiping about the alleged affair of the Teacher’s Assistant (TA) with someone whom the TA had never even seen, would contact (read request) me via other media such as friends and friends of friends.

As my Facebook brood kept multiplying, so did my stalking skills.

There were days when I would go to Liberty Market and practically everyone I saw, seemed to be a known face, thanks to my Facebook tourism skills. This was a world where only new-borns and aliens arrived like divas on a red carpet. There seldom existed an exit door until I realised, after opening a friend’s cousin’s sister-in-law’s profile, that

Something rang inside my head.

I sat myself down and decided to find what else Facebook had in store for me. Many of the ‘friends’ I had on my list seemed to be missing. While some had taken this opportunity to simply ‘un-friending me’, others had actually taken the pain of ‘blocking’ me, thereby completely removing my existence from their (Facebook) lives.

So, instead of enjoying my holiday and going out for a walk in the beautiful autumn evening of Islamabad, I sat in my completely dishevelled hotel room trying to sort this serious life-wrecking mess out. It seems that I lost some ‘friends’ on Facebook due to the following reasons:

1. I practically ridiculed every Naik Parveen in sight by sharing updates from the and also created my own re-mixed DJ versions.

I am sorry but I cannot stand your oozing love for your to-be or not-to-be hubby-licious.